Musician reveals her ‘overwhelming sadness’ after ARIAs
Tones and I has opened up about feeling an "overwhelming sadness" after she cleaned up at the ARIA Awards last year.
The Australian singer, who is the most streamed female artist on Spotify with her electrifying hit Dance Monkey, told The Hit Network's Carrie & Tommy this afternoon she fell into a dark place as she struck fame.
The 26-year-old, whose real name is Toni Watson, won four awards at her first ever ARIAs last year.
"There was a point when we were coming up to the ARIAs last year, I'd had huge success, and the next day I woke up and had this overwhelming sadness and not wanting to celebrate it," she said.
"Not wanting to celebrate with my fans or on social media … As I thought it was a black hole of people that just wanted to bring you down.
"It took me a little bit after that to realise there's so much good there, and to focus on the live performances.
"I was like, 'Why am I not happy, this is meant to be exciting'.
"I had to switch my mind over and focus on those good things, because there are so many good things."
Tones worried fans a few days after the ARIAs when she posted a long spiel on Facebook, saying she was suffering "relentless bullying".
"With success comes judgment and opinions, this I was prepared for, but the relentless bullying that follows every proud moment tears my mind in two," she wrote.
The post came after her inspiring speech when she won Best Female Artist, where she removed a handwritten note from her pocket and said she didn't think she's the "most relatable female artist".
"I'm not into make-up or dresses or typically girly things. But to me, those things don't really define what it is to be a female artist in this industry any more," she said, to huge cheers and applause.
"It's being brave and courageous and true to yourself. No-one could have ever prepared me for the whole world judging me and comparing you to other artists. But what's most important is that you have to be a good person and care about others and carry yourself well," she continued.
"Thank you for Australia letting me know that I'm OK just the way I am."
Speaking to Carrie Bickmore and Tommy Little, Tones, who said she was struggling not touring with her music amid the coronavirus lockdown, added she missed the freedom of her busking days.
The singer was a busker in Byron Bay before she became famous.
"I know people might think once you've become successful in the music industry you're free to do whatever you want, but it's almost the opposite," she said.
"Everything I'm doing is for myself and my career and happiness, but feeling more free as in living in a van, just playing where you want, making enough money just to get by … It really felt free."
Originally published as Tones reveals 'sadness' after big win